23/5/2024 - Garden outside & Inside

Today I had the rare opportunity to sit down in a garden. This was in the part of the township, that is not visited upon by everyone, thanks to its exclusivity. 

The grass was the green and clean, and there was a nice small hill to sit on. I sat down and began my pranayama exercises. Thoughts kept on with their business. 

Thoughts are tied to desires. As long as there as desires, or infact a dissatisfaction with the current moment, there will be thoughts. For me, my current career situation, and all my past ambitions, keep coming back. There is even a certain pride associated with ambition, but the dissatisfaction is also more than evident. The ego, is vain even in its pain. 

So I decided to watch my thoughts. Following Master Eckhart's exercise, I ask myself, what's the next thought. And kept asking this in every half a minute. Slowly, a distance was established with those thoughts and they could be seen, without being overwhelmed or caught. 

Visions, memories, dreams, will appear. They are nothing, but signals, vapours, impulses. The story of your life, is one in many stories you choose to tell yourself. And that it's even your life, is a problematic statment. Who are you? Where are you? But a figment of your imagination? Just because it's a popular dream, like a snake dream, doesn't mean that they are real.

Yet the dream is retold, re-established, every moment, through the day. Stories of successes and failures, remind us everyday of our own stories and full our lives with much misery. 

Aum